Dear Journal,
This is my first official entry. Guess what happened today? Well I said 4 awful words. I've never uttered these words before and I'm not sure where they come from. They just shot out of my mouth like a cannon. I said "I hate my life". So I think it would be fitting to explain the events that may have caused this to happen so my future self will be able to remember. I work in a career that doesn't satisfy me. I go to work everyday mostly because I signed a contract that said I would and because I figured unless God tells me otherwise I better go and try to make the best of it. Well I went to my sis this weekend to babysit. I attended her church and it happened to be the final day for the pastor's anniversary celebration. After hearing all of the wonderful things prophesied over this man's life, I realized I had no idea what my life should look like. Granted I am overall thankful to be in the land of the living, but without purpose I feel as if I am just flopping around like a fish out of water. This week I've been listening to Joel Osteen's book "It's Your Time" and he said that God blesses us when we are where we are supposed to be. Now he did say that he still believes God will bless you regardless but we need to be at our right place. He used animals as an example. Such as a shark wouldn't be in a river or a polar bear in Hawaii. I just had a thought about a book we read for work. In it the author used a bus as an analogy. He stated that leaders need to put the right people in the right seat on the bus in order for it to work.
Questions: Where do I belong? What seat should I take? What's my next move?
I know that every question I ask or pray about won't be answered as quick as I would hope but as of today these are 3 of the questions that I have.
Prayer: Lord, I know that you are a wonderful and mighty God. I love my life because I am yours. You created me to be like you and to say that I hate my life reflects negatively upon you. Lord, I am sorry for sinning against you. I pray that you will grant me mercy and open my eyes to the wonderful aspects of my life. Help me not to compare or be jealous if my life does not mirror someone elses. Help me to be grateful for what I have and anticipate and expect more greatness from you. Thank you Lord for my life and everyone and everything in it.
Amen
